Adriana Lima to Marry Marko Jaric

Never thought I'd be linking to People magazine from this site, but here you go:
Supermodel Adriana Lima Engaged to Basketball Star.

Like the rest of you, I suspect, I find two things deeply troubling about that lead.

1. It was depressing enough when we learned she was dating Jaric in the first place. She didn't need to go and marry the guy.
2. "Basketball Star?"

C'mon, People. You're part of the same company that owns Sports Illustrated and TNT. Couldn't someone place a call to Ian Thomsen or Charles Barkley and get a more... accurate description of Jaric's basketball prowess for that headline?

This is exactly the sort of half-assed corporate synergy that caused the AOL Time Warner merger to fail. (But I'm not bitter.)

Of course, I'd be remiss if I posted a blog entry on any Victoria's Secret model without a photo:

Here's the soon-to-be Mrs. Jaric, re-enacting a scene from Grease with some of her hot friends. Plenty more like it over at Askmen.com.



And here's more on the incredibly, blindingly lucky Mr. Jaric:

Wordless Wednesday: One on One

If they'd decided the nomination with a game of one-on-one, the result probably would have been the same...

From the "I wish I'd thought to write this" file... Christopher Orr of The New Republic applies some of Hillary Clinton's Democratic Primary arguments to the NBA Eastern Conference Finals.

A particularly awesome passage:

Once you abandon the artificial four-games-to-two framework that the media has tried to impose on the series, a very different picture emerges, with the Celtics leading by a mere 549 points to 539. Yes that’s right, the margin between the two teams is less than one percent—a tie, for all intents and purposes. This is probably the closest Conference Finals in NBA history, though I will thank you not to check on that.

Nice work, Mr. Orr.

(Hat-tip to Henry Abbot at True Hoop for the link.)

While we're on the topic of basketball and politics, I'll throw in a plug for something I wrote over on About.com a little while back... analyzing the different candidates from a basketball perspective:

Senator Barack Obama's love of basketball has been well-chronicled throughout the presidential campaign, leaving many to wonder if an Obama White House would feature one-on-one and "H.O.R.S.E" instead JFK's famed touch football.

But what about the other candidates? Don't we have a right to know where they stand on basketball? Can Hillary Clinton sink a jumper? How is John McCain's vertical?

It's our civic duty to examine these questions.

Read the full article, The Basketball Candidate, on collegebasketball.about.com. And thank your lucky stars that we don't have to worry about Mike Huckabee any more.

Oh no... not again

With the Knicks falling to the six spot in the draft, several observers -- like ESPN's Chad Ford -- are calling Italian small forward Danilo Gallinari a good fit for D'Antoni-ball.

Seems like a good time to look back at the last Euro drafted to play at 33rd and 7th.


If I'm not mistaken, the Knicks still own that guy's draft rights.

Worldless Wednesday: Tickle-Me LJ

D'Antoni, Parcells, Showalter and Pedro

For the record, I love the Mike D'Antoni hire.

Seems to me that the biggest objection has been something along these lines:

But his fast-paced system won't work with Stephon and Curry and Randolph!

This is true. It's also irrelevant. No offensive system... not Tex Winters' triangle, not John Calipari's dribble-drive, not coach Norman Dale's "four passes before a shot" would be successful with this mismatched mess of a roster.

(Incidentally, Jimmy Chitwood would be a tremendous D'Antoni player.)

When you're as bad as the Knicks, and an "Extreme Makeover" is coming... you don't hire the coach to match the roster you have. You hire a coach for the roster you're planning.

It also seems worth noting that -- as several other writers have pointed out -- a good portion of the Knick roster is actually very well suited to an up-tempo game, including:

• Jamal Crawford
• David Lee
• Renaldo Balkman
• Nate Robinson
• Jared Jeffries
• Wilson Chandler

Well look at that... that's actually the bulk of the rotation.

But there's another reason I love the hire. Even if D'Antoni isn't the coach to get the Knicks over the top, he instantly brings credibility that had none.

It's worked before.

• In 1997, the New York Jets, coming off a 4-28 run with Rich Kotite leading the team, hired Bill Parcells away from the Patriots. Parcells led the Jets to a 9-7 record in year one and the AFC Championship Game in year two.
• In 1992, the Yankees replaced the hopelessly overmatched Stump Merrill with Buck Showalter. Showalter -- along with a number of key players like Paul O'Neill -- really changed the team's culture. Showalter was let go after a first-round loss in the '95 playoffs, but had set the groundwork for Joe Torre's run of four World Series titles.
• In 2004, the New York Mets signed Pedro Martinez away from the Red Sox. The contract was panned by many -- though Martinez was an elite pitcher, the length of the deal (4 years, $53 million) and his slight build all but guaranteed that the Mets would be overpaying in the later years... but the addition of one of the game's best pitchers proved that the Mets were serious about contending, and may have led to later free agent signings like Carlos Beltran.

Does Mark Jackson give the Knicks instant credibility? Sorry, but no. Everybody thinks Jackson will be a great coach... and I'm inclined to agree. But what are they basing that on, really? He's never coached at any level. He was an excellent point guard...

But Isiah Thomas was better.

Maybe D'Antoni won't work out. Maybe in three years, after a heartbreaking loss in the second round of the playoffs, the Knicks -- led by LeBron James or Chris Bosh -- will need to make a change and bring in someone with a stronger defensive resume.

After the Isiah Thomas years, that's a good problem to have.

Ladies and Gentlemen.... the next general manager of the New York Knicks

I enjoy Kenny Smith as much as anyone... but can someone explain to me why he's even being considered for the Knick GM job?

Quite Frankly...

I'm really going to miss Stephen A. Smith's radio show on 1050 ESPN Radio here in New York.

There, I said it. And I'm not ashamed.

Give and Go: Final Four Recap and Playoff Positioning

For the first 37-and-change minutes of Monday's NCAA championship game, I was planning for this column to be an extended treatise on my man-love of Derrick Rose and some theories on how I could guarantee the Knicks a top-two pick in the upcoming lottery. But my faith was shaken by that last 2:12.

Three things, actually, bothered me deeply about that game. The missed free throws, obviously, were the big thing.

The more disturbing part, though, was the fact that missing those free throws seemed to take both Rose and Chris Douglas-Roberts out of their games completely. Maybe I'm reading too much into what I saw, but it seemed to me they stopped driving to the basket, almost like they didn't want to risk another trip to the line, for fear they'd put up more bricks. I don't think it was a coincidence the missed free throws and Memphis' championship-killing six-minute drought from the field happened simultaneously.

The third thing was actually a piece of insight from Billy Packer, which is remarkable in and of itself, but the ol' curmudgeon did have a good point or two when he wasn't telling us how many possessions the team behind needed to tie the game. (Thank you Billy. We can divide by three just as well as you can.)

At one point, Packer noted that Rose was much more effective when Memphis didn't try to run him off screens. He was at his best taking his man one-on-one off the dribble. And ya know, I think he was right. But here's my problem with that. We were in the last five minutes of Memphis' 40th game of the season, and their point guard, their floor leader, is most comfortable and effective operating OUTSIDE the set offense?!?

It's almost like he's a Knick already!

Story continues on FoxSports.com...

Little Short for a Pivot... but Whatever

In fantasy baseball, there are always a couple of players who have a chance of qualifying at an alternate position and increasing their value tenfold. There’s a chance, however slight, that Brandon Inge will get in enough games to slot in at catcher…

The fantasy basketball equivalent: anyone on the Golden State roster. Our latest example: in a game on March 30, swingman Kelenna Azubuike was officially listed as the Warriors’ starting center, as coach Don Nelson went with an ultra-small lineup in an attempt to match up with the Nuggets.

Depending on how liberal your league’s position requirements are, Azubuike might qualify now at shooting guard – and in the middle. At this time of year, that sort of roster quirk could be very useful, especially if Azubuike contributes more lines like his output on April 4 against Memphis: 40 minutes, 15 points, 10 boards, 6-12 from the field, 2-2 from three.

How many centers can give you numbers like that?

Story continues on NBA.com...

Shades of Willis Reed

Dirk Nowitzki's return from injury has been nothing short of amazing.

When the diagnosis "high ankle sprain" was announced, most observers assumed Nowitzki would be – at the very least – hobbled for the rest of the regular season. The "two week" estimate for his return was viewed with skepticism – if not outright mockery. But Nowitzki made his surprise return to the lineup a mere 10 days later.

And the Nowitzki we're seeing isn't hobbling around like Kirk Gibson on ruined knees in the World Series. He's playing at – or above – his season averages. On a per-game basis since his return, Nowitzki's averaging 25.7 points and 7.0 rebounds. For the season: 23.5 points and 8.7 rebounds.

More importantly, he's leading the Mavs to wins. Dallas is in the midst of a brutal stretch of schedule that will decide whether or not they make the playoffs in an unforgiving Western Conference. They've won two of three games since Nowitzki's return, beating the Warriors on April 2nd and the Suns on Sunday (with a loss at the Lakers in between). Those two wins are Dallas' only two over winning teams since the acquisition of Jason Kidd at the trade deadline.

As I write, the Mavs are in seventh place in the West, two games ahead of Golden State and Denver, with five games remaining. Their remaining games: Seattle (home), Utah (home), Portand (away), Seattle (away) and New Orleans (home) -- that's two must-wins over a bad Sonics team and three more chances to improve that record against winning teams. If they can close out the season on a high – maybe upset the Spurs in a first-round matchup – we might start talking about Dirk's ankle the way we talk about Willis' knees or Schilling's bloody sock.

Story continues on RotoWire...

Let the Kids Play

As the playoff picture becomes more concrete, more teams will be looking to take an extended look at younger players or get the veterans healthy for the postseason. A quick look at the standings may offer hints on where to look for help on the waiver wire.

On the top end of the standings, the Celtics have clinched the Atlantic Division and hold a six-game lead over the Pistons for the top spot in the Eastern Conference. We’re already seeing Doc Rivers give his subs some extra playing time as a result.

Detroit is more or less locked into the two seed. They’ve clinched the Central division and hold a five-and-a-half game cushion over the Southeast champs, the Magic. Like the Celtics, they can afford to give the younger guys some run. So can the Magic, who are locked into the three seed with a six-game lead over fourth-place Cleveland.

One game separates spots five through seven in the East, so the Wizards, Raptors and Sixers will be playing all-out through to the end, as will the Hawks, who are currently three games up on the Nets and Pacers for the last playoff position.

In the West, just six games separate the one seed from the ninth spot, and none of the divisions are set yet. No one is resting anyone.

On the bottom end of the standings, the Knicks and Heat are the only teams that have been mathematically eliminated in the East, but the Bulls, Bobcats and Bucks don’t have much of a shot at this point. In the West, the Kings, Clippers, T-Wolves, Grizzlies and Sonics are out of the running, and Portland – five games behind ninth-place Denver -- is very close to being officially eliminated.

Story continues on NBA.com...

Welcome Back, Fellas

Couple of big names made surprise returns to the court last night:

Most Dramatic Return: Gilbert Arenas -- no question. Gotta hand it to Agent Zero: dude has a flair for the dramatic. He didn't even take his spot on the bench until five minutes had elapsed in the first quarter, so as not to give away the surprise.

The only way he could have improved on his entrance is if he'd come dancing down the aisle in an Uncle Sam costume like Apollo Creed before the Drago fight.

Unfortunately for the Wiz, the game ended a bit like the Drago fight... Arenas played nearly 20 minutes and scored 19 points, but Washington lost on a buzzer-beater by "who dat" guard Ramon Sessions -- and may have lost DeShawn Stevenson and Antawn Jamison to new injuries.

Most Surprising Return: Dirk Nowitzki's return surprised for a couple of reasons. First off -- high ankle sprains ordinarily don't heal that quickly... I shudder to think about the tape-job he needed to get on the court, or what his ankle is feeling like today. Second -- his return helped propel Dallas to a victory over a team with a winning record -- their first since the Jason Kidd trade.

Most Significant Return: This one could go to Pau Gasol, who played 30 minutes and scored 10 points in the Lakers' win over Portland -- but we're holding off on handing a title to the Lakers until we see their entire projected lineup - including Andrew Bynum - on the floor together.

As such, we're calling Elton Brand's return the most significant of the night... considering the game was his season debut. Brand came off the bench for 25-and-change minutes, scoring 19 points, grabbing five boards, and showing countless fantasy owners that they might get a bit of return on that roster spot he's been occupying all season.

In leagues where no one took a flyer on a possible return by Brand -- and according to the stats on Ultimate Fantasy Commissioner, that's around four out of every five leagues -- get to that waiver wire and make your claims. Where else are you going to find a 20-and-10 guy this late in the season?

Jail is too good for some people...

"It's amazing that he can still be out on the road."

-- Timberwolves coach Randy Wittman

It sure is, coach.

I'm distressed to report (thanks to TrueHoop) that the drunk driver who killed Malik Sealy has been arrested for yet another DUI in Minnesota. By my count, this is Souksangouane Phengsene's fourth such arrest.

He should be in jail already, having been sentenced to six years in prison after his last arrest in 2006 -- but a judge reduced that sentence to a year in a work program.

Here's hoping the state of Minnesota can dig up a somewhat less sympathetic jurist this time.

Give and Go: Donnie Walsh, the '07 Draft and More

From: zegers@rotowire.com
Subject: Give and Go
Date: March 25, 2008 7:50 AM PDT
To: liss@rotowire.com

First things first -- how are your brackets? Sadly, I had Pittsburgh and Georgetown in the Final Four, so my chances of finishing in the money are very similar to the Knicks' chances of making the playoffs.

I stand behind my Georgetown pick... but the Pitt selection, in retrospect, was pretty dumb. If I had factored in the "seven man rotation" factor and the "sent to Denver" factor, I might have realized that they'd be absolutely dead on their feet mid-way through the second half of their second game... which, of course, is what happened.

Now that you've had a chance to actually see some college ballers this year, anyone jump out at you as an NBA prospect?

That aside, there are two big NBA stories on all the back pages -- Dirk Nowitzki's injury and Donnie Walsh's job status.

Not much to say about Nowitzki that I didn't already say in this week's Barometer -- I love Brandon Bass as a short-term pickup in every fantasy format, and I think there's a very real possibility that the Mavs will fall out of the playoff picture. Agree? Disagree?

As for Donnie Walsh... as I wrote on my blog last week, I was really beginning to think Walsh was just using the Knicks to secure a better deal from the Pacers. (Actually, I'm not convinced that wasn't the case -- it may be that it just didn't work.) Now most of the NBA press is reporting that Walsh will take a job at Madison Square Garden any day now.

You think he's the right man for the job? He has an excellent reputation -- but the Pacers haven't exactly been the picture of stability over the last several seasons. Would you rather have him running your team, or one of the other oft-mentioned candidates -- a Kiki Vanderweghe or Jerry Colangelo or -- dare I suggest it -- Jerry West?

Personally, I'm a Colangelo guy. Jerry West, it has been reported, hates New York -- at best, hiring the Logo means giving an NBA legend one more payday... but the Knicks just did that with Isiah Thomas.

I'm not sure what Kiki did to merit the reputation he seems to have as a front-office guy, aside from having 'Melo fall into his lap. Tell me again where he drafted Nikoloz Tskitishvili? Fifth overall? In a draft where Amare Stoudemire went ninth and Caron Butler 10th?

Actually, a lot of guys would like a do-over in that draft... after Yao Ming (1st) Stoudemire and Butler there's a whole lot of "unfulfilled potential" in the top of that draft.

Column continues on RotoWire.com...

Working the Wire

Last week in this space, I wrote about injuries as the main source of useful fantasy players at this point of the season.

This week, we’ll put that theory to the test.

The Injury: Dirk Nowitzki suffered the dreaded “high ankle” sprain as well as a sprained knee during Sunday’s game.

The prognosis: The ankle injury is being called “moderate” while the knee injury is “slight.”
Initial estimates had him returning in as little as a week to two weeks – but short of a pilgrimage to Lourdes, high ankle sprains don’t typically heal that fast.

The options: You’d generally expect him to be shelved for 3-4 weeks with this sort of injury – but the season ends three weeks from today.

Dallas is in a particularly tough spot. They’re currently sitting in seventh place in the West and are very much in danger of falling out of playoff position. At the same time, they really can’t risk losing Nowitzki for the playoffs, should they qualify. So the scenarios might break down like this:

Story continues on NBA.com...

Bass Fishin'

Before you read the rest of this column, go put in a waiver claim on Brandon Bass. Hurry. I'll wait.

All set?

Good.

Now then... unless you've been in deep seclusion due to the fact that you had Duke, Georgetown and Pittsburgh in the Final Four, you know that Dirk Nowitzki suffered a "lower leg" injury during Sunday's game. As of Monday afternoon, that Bill Belichick-ian diagnosis has been clarified – Nowitzki has a high ankle sprain and a knee sprain. As you know if you read Jim Russo's "In Street Clothes" column here on RotoWire, a high ankle sprain is bad news. To quote Mr. Russo:

A high ankle sprain is more severe than the ankle sprains you typically see because it involves not only the stabilizing ligaments on the inside and outside of the ankle, but also the syndesmotic ligament, a circular shaped structure which wraps the distal end of the tibia and fibula, the long bones of the lower leg. When the ankle rolls severely, it can stretch this ligament causing those two bones to separate to a small degree. It's not much but the swelling and pain is extreme and the ankle becomes unstable.

Now I'm not much on book learnin' – but based on that explanation and the official diagnosis, it seems to me that the initial report that Dirk would return in two weeks is a bit aggressive.

Article continues on Rotowire.com...

Working the Wire

With the NCAA Tournament starting this week, it seems appropriate to kick off this week’s column with a quote from a legend in the college hoops ranks, Mr. Rick Pitino.

Larry Bird is not walking through that door, fans. Kevin McHale is not walking through that door, and Robert Parish is not walking through that door.

Now, Rick Pitino was addressing what he felt were overly negative Boston fans at the time… not fantasy basketball owners. But the point is a good one for fantasy GMs to consider. By this point of the season, it’s incredibly unlikely that you’ll land a superstar – or even a solid top-of-rotation player on the waiver wire. It’s time to set your sights a bit lower.


Column continues on NBA.com...

The Donnie Walsh Bait & Switch

The New York Daily News has reporters following Donnie Walsh around like pararazzi chasing a panty-less Britney Spears.

He's considering leaving the Pacers, they say... He doesn't like sharing responsibility with Larry Bird... Bird doesn't think the power-sharing arrangement in Indiana is working either.

Yadda yadda yadda.

And today, via ESPN.com, we have the kicker. Bird isn't sure he'll be back as Pacers president next season.

Doesn't this all seem a bit strange?

If Walsh is leaving, why would Bird be leaving too? Unless all this talk with the Knicks is simply Walsh's way of saying "you can have Larry Legend... or you can have me. Oh, and FYI... when I was running the show, we were actually pretty good."

Like maybe... just maybe... ol' Donnie Walsh is using an extended flirtation with Jim Dolan to drive out a rival and win back control of the Pacers.

Brackets

Selection Sunday has come and gone, and now it's time to get down to business...

Here's our breakdown of the 2008 NCAA Tournament, region by region.

Story continues on About.com...